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Whoa...

I guess its been a while... Had baby on the 16th of July... The same day of my best friend's birthday! Is that cool or what?

Many things have happened since I last posted. For one I no longer have my angry pregnant hormones... time to go back and see what I wrote.

Finally got a digital camera and have been putting up art from years ago. It's been great. Got Paint.net too. It's kinda like Photoshop.

Baby's watching Treehouse TV now... she loves the colors I'm assuming.

Man... Don't even know where to start. Meh. I'll think of something eventually.

bitchiness...

So I was a total bitch to my best friend today... but really.  I'm so sick of everyone butting into my business.  Here she is defending the baby's father and telling me I don't know what I'm doing... Uh...

So far as I know, he's a complete deuchbag...  and doesn't deserve the final chance I gave him.  All the people I know that are already mothers agree... but the moment someone who's younger than me and doesn't have kids thinks they know more than me, they tell me.  It's really unfair.  Especially when my anger over being told to be nice to the jerkwad that told me to abort my baby then abandons me for my entire pregnancy and goes so far as to defend him is all blamed on my hormones.  NO.  I'm actually angry because I don't see why you feel sorry for him when he put me through all this shit.  He deserves to be spit on by me until he actually reconsiles.

Its not my fault he's bloody clueless and doesn't know his ass from his head.  God.  I'm so sick of immature men.  Why was I so stupid before?  I guess it was my lesson to learn.  Doesn't make it any more fun or any less frustrating...

On another note...  I watched House the other day... first time in months... I really need to use my cable once in a while for more than internet.  I love House.  He's so awesome.  In this one the lady boss puts him on clinic duty and every single one of them thinks they have an STD or something... wait, STI here in Canada...  Wait... is it really different in both countries?  If so that's stupid.  Either way, everyone knows what they are, and that Chlamydia is like the only one that you can cure...  So why pretty it up and make it look a little better?  Infections vs. Disease...  the fact that they ARE diseases and should be treated accordingly has no bearing on common sense apparently.  Oh well.  Stupid government as always.

New beginning?

So after a long LONG talk with my brother...  and many MANY tears for me...  we came to an understanding...  Its all been He Said She Said bullshit going around the apartment building.  For gods sake.  I feel bad for blaming her for everything... but really.  When you set yourself up to look like an asshole, people generally tend to think you are.  I'm not so angry anymore now that my brother has seen my side of the whole bloody story.  At least things were said that needed to be said.  Maybe things will work out for the better.  I can only hope seeing as I'm trying not to be involved...  Oh well.  Lets hope!

WHY?

I really wonder how hard it is to keep your nose out of other's business.  I wouldn't know because I'm never tempted to stick mine into anyone elses.  I prefer to stress about my own life and not bother with other people's problems.  So why is it that everyone thinks they can butt into mine?  I really don't know.

Apparently I'm being extremely childish by not speaking to my brother.  Uh... No.  I don't want to talk to him because the last time I tried, he ignored me.  Excuse me for not wanting to walk into a slap in the face.  He can talk to me when he feels he's ready.  Then he can bloody well apologize for letting his woman for her lovely letter telling me how childish I am.  *sigh*

Another point.  Don't you think that being 9 months pregnant is an excuse to not want anyone elses problems?  I'm keeping away because they just broke up and got back together...  I don't need more shit on my plate thanks.  I'm worried enough about baby and when she's coming.  Not about what my brother and his woman are doing or thinking.  Anymore of this and I'm getting our mother to field them off.  She's been waiting for an opportunity to put both of them in their places.  Can't say I blame her.  When it comes to them there's no wrongs done.  Everyone else has the problem.  We just seem to keep fucking up their lives.

In other news, the baby's father is back in the picture.  He's willing to pay child support and whatnot.  He actually wants to see her and be a part of her life.  We met yesterday and discussed a few things.  The meeting went good, but its still a little to early to tell if he's completely sincere.

Lastly, my father is visiting this weekend... I haven't seen him for years... but the fact that he's actually coming to visit ME is saying something.  Hopefully he's finally realized that he needs to play an active role in my life if he wants to know his first grandchild.

Is it just me or is the drama that has ensnared my life starting to sound soap opera-ish?

Transformers 2

And here I was thinking it couldn't get better.  We barely got into the theatre as its cheap night.  And then theres a million people budding in line...  I nearly snapped on these kids...  They cut in front of us, then someone did the same to them, and they started bitching about it...    And then the movie was amazing.  Is it just me or did they not play up the female Autobots enough?  I wasn't too pleased.  Really loved the old Decepticon Jet Fire.  He was freaking awesome.

"Do you know what its like to slowly fall apart and die?"

Why yes... we do.  Its called aging.  You're lucky it takes you hundreds of years buddy.  We get at most only a hundred. 

But he was amazing.  Him and his crazy accent.  Totally loved him.

Sewing


Yes!  This year for my birthday my mother got me a sewing machine...  and I love it.  I can't wait to play with it... in fact, I've already tore apart several pillows so I could make cushions for my cats apartment.  She didn't like it until I put them in.  Now she wont leave it.

In other news, baby dropped the other day... as in she's in position to be born.  It was a painful process, but I like to think it was worth it.  The only really bad part is the fact that my feet have swollen so bad that I no longer fit my shoes, sandals, or crocs.  *sigh*  I really don't know what I'm going to wear to the hospital when I have her.

Got everything now that I need for baby.  Except a swing.  And a diaper genie...  but the swing wont be needed for a while... and the diaper genie is only a luxury.  I'm sure I'll survive without it.

More news... The babies father decided to pull his head out of his ass...  but is still being incredible immature about it.  "I thought I messaged her..."  If so, why did my friend get the text asking her to ask me if Wednesday was a good day to discuss baby's future?  Honestly... he did the same thing before I dumped him.  "I thought I messaged you when I got back from Cuba..."  When I spotted him with another woman at the Walmart... *shakes head*  Why are all men stupid?

In the drama department, my brother and his girlfriend have FINALLY broken up.   Thank god.  I was waiting for this forever.  The only problem now is that my brother wont let her go.  WHY?  After all the shit she's put him through...  Again, men are stupid.  Even my own brother.  I'm just keeping my nose out of this...  I REALLY don't need to get in the middle of their fights.

I think this is the reason I don't believe in love.  Other than familial love.  It never works.  One person cares too much, the other not enough.  And it always ends in tears.  Wow I sound depressing.  HORMONES.  Not me.

Baby Shower

So... I had my baby shower today and guess what...  No one shows up...  I had over ten people promise to be there.  No one calls to tell me why either.  So when I finally get on Facebook and change my status to ask why people didn't show up I get a few hits.  One person slept through it.  Another had to work but didn't call.  Another had running around to do.  Still no calls.  What really gets me is that they tell me "I'm so sorry, but I got you a present."

WHO THE FUCK CARES?  I didn't have a baby shower to get presents.  I had one so that I could hang out with friends and get all excited over the baby.  And so I end up all excited over nothing and feeling stupid for actually thinking people cared enough to show up.  Out of all the excuses, one was valid.  *sigh*

Maybe is the pregnancy hormones... I don't know.  I find it really unfair that no one called and said sorry.  Not one person.  I'm just glad my mom and her two friends were there.  They all wasted money on the food and entertainment and decorations... and I feel horrible about it since I told them there was supposed to be a lot of people...  They keep telling me that they had a good time at least and that they didn't waste money.  Just trying to be nice is what I think.

I guess this is what I get for trusting people.

Just starting out.

Erm...  I think it's a little sad that I'm technically 21 in 22 minutes yet this is my first LJ post ever.  That's ok.  I have many more things to do than keep a journal.  Exactly what I have to do I am not sure.  My current picture is Angry Cid.  Drawn by Morgan-chan some time ago for me and I finally colored it on paint.  Don't use photoshop as I'm pretty inept with it.  Um... is this long enough?  I think I'm done here.

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Death Note, detective, L
duetmaoim
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